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On the Subject of Cheese


‘Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese’

G.K. Chesterton


I hope for a moment you’ll indulge me please

Of sincerely reciting on the subject of cheese

When peckish at night, I go down to the cellar

For succulent balls of milky mozzarella

A peculiar feeling seems to come over

When I take a bite of blue-veined gorgonzola

Try as you might, you wouldn’t dare

resist a dip in the baked camembert

With a plate of pasta, I’ll do all I can

To cover the whole thing with grated parmesan

I’m fuming whenever I don’t get a lotta

the velvety mouthfeel of creamy ricotta

If I had to guess the favourite cheese of the great English poet,

the writer of Paradise Lost, the one and only John Milton

It would be stilton

Whenever we meet, don’t just say ‘Hi!’ to me

Give me the squeakiness of grilled halloumi

On the first date with my wife, it’s the one thing I fed her

A long firm stick of some fine mature cheddar

At home, at the shops, on the road or at sea

There’s nothing to challenge a good slice of brie

A boring old salad is only made better

With loads of cubes of crumbling feta

When I’m feeling down, you would rarely fail

To cheer me up with some Wensleydale

Sliced bread’s the greatest invention? Please!

It would all be for nought without wonderful cheese!